I took our car to Caress Carwash over by my house because I don't have time to hand wash the thing - plus, the car wash does a nice cleaning job and it sprays fun colored soap on my car. So, decided to take Lydia through in our car thinking it would be like the circus. Singing, laughing, thrilled shreaks of joy...
Instead of the expected giggles, pointing, and excitment - it was wide-eyed terror that turned to frantic screaming. Suddenly I felt trapped. What once as a colorful and fun spray and spin cycle turned into guns blasting the car and a big multi-armed monster enveloping our car. Lydia was having a melt down. Even as we sat there in the endless car wash, I grabbed her hand and told her it was okay - Daddy was here. It didn't help.
What felt like three hours later - the door opened and we finally escaped.
It took fifteen minutes to calm her. Whew.
What is ironic is the other day I found her on climbing step number three in our basement (since we have put up a little barrier to keep this from happening again). She had climbed up there all by herself...no help, no fear. I pulled her down and was momenterally terrified of the potential devistation that could have happend had she fallen. As soon as her feet hit the floor - she went right back to those steps and started climbing. I tried to put my hands around her to hold her - and with the arogance of a one year old she pushed my hands away. So, I snatched her up and carried her to safety where she proceeded to inform our entire neighborhood that she wasn't happy with that move.
After the car was episode I started thinking about what makes us afraid - and what should makes us afraid.
In the car wash - there was nothing that could hurt her. Yet, from her perspective - even with Daddy there trying to calm her - she was terrorized. And on the stairs, one mis-step (which is common for her) and she would have fallen to serious injury. In the car wash, I was amazed at the ridiculousness of Lydia's fear. She was terrorized by the car wash which could do nothing to harm her, but unafraid of choices that could lead to real pain and injury. In both cases, when I got involved - it didn't help. In the car wash, my reaching out to comfort her was not enough to end her fear...and when I stepped in to help keep her from harm - she pushed me away and eventually was upset by my care and protection.
It is so true how watching your kids teaches you so much about life. So many times in my life I am terrorized by things that I need not worry about. And so often in those times of fear and worry, God is desperately trying to get my attention to remind me who He is and how much He cares. On the other hand, sometimes I make risky choices that with one misstep could cause injury. And when God steps in to help keep me from harm - I "push him away" or even get upset because I am not getting what I want.
So, what have you been "afraid of" lately? How might God our Father be trying to calm and care for you?
What choices have you been making that should make you a little "afraid"?
Or perhaps, have you been paying attention to how God might be trying to warn you about some of the choices you are making?